Confessions of a Shopaholic

I really need new clothes.

-Me, every morning.

Clothes is my life. I love clothes whether it’s accessories, handbags or shoes. I love them so much that, at my first job, I would work 20-25 hours a week, get paid $100 and used it within 30 minutes. Spending money on clothes wasn’t just a problem, it became my life.

The Ugly Truth

This spending habit stayed with me throughout the years and it became a major problem in my marriage and my walk with God. My husband doesn’t limit my spending nor does he make me feel guilty but over the years I have seen the struggle in him to continue to be patient. There were dark days where I kept buying new things and throwing them out after the season was over. The other times were not being able to pay some bills causing others to worry about me and question where all my money was going.

Then I started questioning myself, “What was my purpose for all this spending?” I started to feel guilty for all those times that we could have used that money towards something else. It could have helped us to pay off some bills or help support a church in whatever area they needed.

New Beginning

One day I stumbled upon a video about minimalism and it stunned me that there are people who can live like that. I mean the only type of minimalism I was ever exposed to was survival living which was brought up by my husband. Hmong families who came to America lived like a minimalist because they didn’t know any other way but to survive. Of course, I didn’t live like I was trying to survive nor was I living like a minimalist but now I have a choice.

In August of 2019, I decided I would start this minimalism lifestyle/journey. I want be more aware of where my money was going, how it’s being spent and what I can do with it. Most importantly what brings me joy and not what other people will think about me. I started out with small steps such as buying 1-2 pieces of clothing instead of 3-4 pieces. My most surprising accomplishment was during my husband’s family holiday gathering. One of the open activities that we had was shopping and I didn’t want to go. I wanted to stick with my budget of using money for gas and food only. This new change was definitely something everyone saw and asked if I was really sure I didn’t want to go shopping.

Now that February is over I can safely say I have not bought a single clothing item. This doesn’t include any type of accessories or shoes. I know you are wondering how is it that I’m considering this small step an achievement, but this is my goal that I achieved. This is my journey to celebrate and it’s my struggle I needed to overcome. No, I didn’t save a major amount of money but I am no longer feeling guilty.

What did I do with “all” that money that I saved? My husband and I were able to give our daughter a bedroom makeover. She has asked for a room filled with her own personality but mostly for a space she can call her own. We aren’t finished with everything but its something I can be proud of and selfishly say I am slowly improving.

See you in the next no spend month.

2 replies on “I Have A Problem

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